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Famous Author Releases
Ground Breaking New Alternative Health Book
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Brian Carter is one famous author you may not have heard
of.
This certified boy genius, wise beyond his years having
risen from the ashes of personal crisis, this nouveau renaissance
man of wide ranging intellect, famous author Carter has
been called many things... among the more flattering
are "America's Acupuncturist", and both "the
Dr. Phil of Alternative Medicine" and the "Puff
Daddy of Alternative Medicine".
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Who is this supposedly famous author Brian Carter
and where did he come from?
While he claims to have narrowly escaped the depressive
clutches of Dayton, Ohio, experts are still seeking the truth.
Current theories range from "he sprung fully grown from the
head of Bill Clinton" to "he's some kind of weird genetic
engineering product of the vast Right Wing Conspiracy masterminded
by Karl Rove."
However, most of the aforementioned experts currently
require antidepressants.
So if Brian Carter is a famous author, how
come I've never heard of him?
Experts maintain (and these are different experts
who don't need medication) that the nature of the universe is
uncertain - all the way down to the quantum physics level, we
only have best guesses of why things are the way they are.
What's more, for those who subscribe to intelligent
design, God created a universe that, for Him, is beyond time,
and all fame is temporary, so the only truly famous Person ever
is the Triune God. Even Lincoln and Einstein are just burps in
the HCl of history's gastric mucosa.
You're missing the point. Is Brian Carter really
a famous author or not?
Um. Well, no. Not yet. But if you buy his book,
you can help him get there. Brian Carter will be a famous author
once Powerful Body Peaceful Mind
is on the bestseller list, and it should be, because it's the
alternative medicine book of the decade!
Book of the decade. Uh huh. Is this another
one of those time is relative things?
Yes! Isn't it amazing? Did you know that space
is actually curved?
Are you on drugs?
No! Why, does it look like I need them? Wait a
minute! What does that have to do with Brian Carter being a famous
author?
Which he's not. Nothing. Do you have any more
pseudo-proof or circular fallacious arguments about Carter, or
can I go now?
Yes, I mean yes I have more! He really is the Puff Daddy of Alternative
Medicine- I mean how could you have photos
of the guy with mega famous people if he wasn't a famous author?
Dude, just because he's with them doesn't mean he's famous.
It doesn't?
Arrrggghhh. I'm out of here.
Hey, wait! Did you see his famous
author bio?
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