Alternative Medicine That Works for Regular Folks
Updated September 1, 2004



















Brian Carter, acupuncturist, herbalist, and author

(Formerly titled 'Help Me Choose My Book Title!')

Excerpt from
Powerful Body, Peaceful Mind
"How to Mess Up Your Emotions"

By Brian B. Carter, MS, LAc

Brian teaches at the Pacific College of Oriental Medicine and maintains a private acupuncture and herbal practice in San Diego, California. He is the author of Powerful Body, Peaceful Mind: How to Heal Yourself with Foods, Herbs, and Acupressure.

[old information about book title deleted -Ed.*]

[* Ed is this weird old guy who wanders around the PulseMed offices and occasionally changes random webpages. Sorry. We're working on that. -Brian]

Book Excerpt

This is me teaching in reverse. I'm using humor to show you what not to do. Of course, the book also tells you what to do for emotional well being.

How to Mess Up Your Emotions

1. Nitpick.
2. Don't exercise.
3. Eat loads of sugar.
4. Focus on what's wrong.
5. Do, do, do. Never relax.
6. Focus on what you don't have.
7. Wallow in guilt and self-doubt.
8. Think about yourself all the time.
9. Take only symptom-relieving drugs.
10. Overdo it until you collapse. Repeat.
11. Keep working. Breaks are for wimps.
12. Fantasize about the future while doing nothing.
13. Do whatever you want whenever you feel like it.
14. If you're codependent, find an egotist to practice on.
15. Worry as much as possible - it means you really care.
16. Don't try to help others; they'll never change anyway.
17. Drink until you pass out every day. Come to. Repeat.
18. Stubbornly hang on to vague goals of huge magnitude.
19. If you're an egotist, find a codependent to support you.
20. Decide you don't have enough time to improve yourself.
21. Be skeptical - when everyone else is wrong, you never are.
22. Make sure you always have newer, cooler stuff than your neighbors.
23. Ignore your body, appetite, and sleep - substitute caffeine and sugar.
24. Don't socialize; it's a waste of time. You're too good for them anyway.
25. Don't look at yourself. Don't change the way you live. Never ever grow.
26. Associate with the people you can get the most out of while giving the least.
27. Think negative and you'll never be disappointed. You're only being realistic.
28. Occasionally take breaks from self-absorption to envy and resent everyone else.
29. If what you're doing isn't working, try harder; it's bound to work sooner or later.

I also did a more concise version of this list in a top ten form,
The Top 10 Ways to Mess Up Your Emotions

If you like the top 10 version, you can also get a free picture of me and David Letterman with the top 10 for your desktop background.
Go to our free download stuff page to get it!

About The PULSE
All information herein provided is for educational use only and not meant to substitute for the advice of appropriate local experts and authorities.

Copyright 1999-2074, Pulse Media International, Brian Carter, MSci, LAc, Editor