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[old information about book title deleted -Ed.*]
[* Ed is this weird old guy who wanders
around the PulseMed offices and occasionally changes random
webpages. Sorry. We're working on that. -Brian]
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Book Excerpt
This is me teaching in reverse. I'm using humor to show you what
not to do. Of course, the book also tells you what to do
for emotional well being.
How to Mess Up Your Emotions
1. Nitpick.
2. Don't exercise.
3. Eat loads of sugar.
4. Focus on what's wrong.
5. Do, do, do. Never relax.
6. Focus on what you don't have.
7. Wallow in guilt and self-doubt.
8. Think about yourself all the time.
9. Take only symptom-relieving drugs.
10. Overdo it until you collapse. Repeat.
11. Keep working. Breaks are for wimps.
12. Fantasize about the future while doing nothing.
13. Do whatever you want whenever you feel like it.
14. If you're codependent, find an egotist to practice on.
15. Worry as much as possible - it means you really care.
16. Don't try to help others; they'll never change anyway.
17. Drink until you pass out every day. Come to. Repeat.
18. Stubbornly hang on to vague goals of huge magnitude.
19. If you're an egotist, find a codependent to support you.
20. Decide you don't have enough time to improve yourself.
21. Be skeptical - when everyone else is wrong, you never are.
22. Make sure you always have newer, cooler stuff than your neighbors.
23. Ignore your body, appetite, and sleep - substitute caffeine
and sugar.
24. Don't socialize; it's a waste of time. You're too good for
them anyway.
25. Don't look at yourself. Don't change the way you live. Never
ever grow.
26. Associate with the people you can get the most out of while
giving the least.
27. Think negative and you'll never be disappointed. You're only
being realistic.
28. Occasionally take breaks from self-absorption to envy and
resent everyone else.
29. If what you're doing isn't working, try harder; it's bound
to work sooner or later.
I also did a more concise version of this list in a top ten form,
The
Top 10 Ways to Mess Up Your Emotions
If you like the top 10 version, you can also get
a free picture of me and David Letterman with the top 10 for your
desktop background.
Go to our free download stuff
page to get it!
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